


Finally Growing Wise

by minkhollow



Category: Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog
Genre: Community: femgenficathon, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-08-15
Updated: 2009-08-15
Packaged: 2017-10-02 11:40:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minkhollow/pseuds/minkhollow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Penny can't say what the world's coming to, when a jewel thief is asking her for help <i>against</i> the Evil League of Evil and both of the new guys in her life have surprisingly nasty sides to them, but either way, she suspects her life just got a lot more interesting - and that she can't just ignore this one until it goes away.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Finally Growing Wise

**Author's Note:**

> I've wanted to do Penny backstory that isn't a dating roster for a while now, and this ficathon is the perfect place for it. We go AU shortly after Act I, though some lines and situational spoilers from Act II apply. Thanks to Gehayi and Quinby for beta-reading.  
> Femgen prompt: _It is bitter to lose a friend to evil before one loses him to death._\-- Mary Renault (1905-1983), English author of contemporary and historical novels, and non-fiction.  
> I am not Joss, as ever; I just borrow out of love. (And because Penny deserves a chance to be truly awesome.)

It's Friday afternoon. Penny's been seeing Captain Hammer for a week, more or less, and she's talked to Billy a couple of times; the latter feels like it's long overdue, in a way, but the former is still mostly unexpected. She's not entirely sure what to think of Captain Hammer so far.

Among other things, it's the first time she's talked to a hero since... well, in years, and she can't decide whether he really lives up to the hype in person. But she's willing to give him the chance to prove that he does.

She has the afternoon off of work, and is spending it helping out in the shelter; volunteering helps her clear her head, and keeps her from dwelling on the worst points of working retail. The shelter's director has said that he wishes he had the hours to give her on the payroll, and that maybe if the petitions work out, he can do something. She'd quite like that, but until there's something for sure, she's going to hold on to what she's got.

She's looking over the sign-in sheets for the last few days, trying to figure out who's been around a lot and who's likely to be there for dinner, when someone comes in - a dark-skinned woman who doesn't look like she particularly needs the shelter's help, but rather like she's there on a mission of some sort. That's confirmed when she walks up to the desk, regards Penny for a few moments, and says, "We need to talk, I think. Perhaps not here and now, but we should."

"O... kay," Penny replies; she has no idea what the other woman could possibly mean, but she doesn't tend to turn people away when they want to talk to her. "I'm out when the dinner shift gets here, if you want to hang around until then?"

"All right. I will be outside, when you finish."

It's about an hour from that until the dinner shift, but the woman is indeed still waiting, when Penny gets her bag and leaves. That's a bit of a surprise, but she can work with it.

The woman falls into step next to her, and says nothing for a few blocks, until they get to an area that doesn't have much in the way of pedestrian traffic. Then she says, "You are the Soothsayer's sister, are you not?"

"I was."

"Well, naturally, the tenses get tricky when one dies. We have a common acquaintance, I believe."

Penny frowns. "I doubt it. I don't get involved in that stuff."

"You do not always have to be involved, in order to have the acquaintance."

"Look, whatever you might have known about Sandra, you _don't_ know it about me." Penny doesn't usually snap like that, but her sister is still a very sore point. "I don't get involved with that shit. I don't take sides. And I _really_ don't think we know any of the same people."

"I do not take sides either," the woman says; Penny tries to place her accent, but can't really tell the difference between West Indies and West Africa. "As for the situation at hand, I would not be entirely surprised if he hasn't told you all of the relevant details, but you do know him. I doubt I've missed my guess that far."

"How can you not take sides if you know who my sister was, and used that as a reason to seek me out?"

"I may prefer one set of company, but that has more to do with the assumptions people make. Or do not make, in this case. And... I would rather our mutual acquaintance not veer too far in one direction."

"Why would you say that?"

The woman shrugs with one shoulder. "I do not think it would suit him. Anyway, I've already seen one person's life that's affected by having to drop everything and cater to the whims of a horse. He does not realise, I think, how little time that will leave him for his work, lab or no lab."

"That's... still not enough to tell me who you're actually talking about."

"And there, we run into a problem. I do not know what he calls himself outside of his... special pursuits, and you do not seem to know about those pursuits. If you would do me the favor of taking it on faith until I can bring you some proof, we will find our answers on that front."

Penny still doesn't like this at all; it's reminding her too much of her last argument with Sandra for her comfort. "And how do I know I can trust you?"

"It will benefit us both to step in, in this situation. If it wouldn't benefit you, I would leave you be. It is not my style, to pull people into things that do not serve them well."

"Well... I'm more inclined to believe you than I was my own sister. But I still want to know who you're talking about before I agree to anything."

"Entirely fair." The woman smiles. "Give me two days, and you will have the information."

She leaves at the next corner; Penny keeps walking until she gets home, and tries to focus all of her energy on fixing dinner. That works long enough that she doesn't burn anything, but after she eats, she finds herself running low on distractions.

It's weird, in a way. Every time she thinks she's convinced herself she can just put Sandra behind her and move on, something comes up that reminds her she had a sister, once, and they were even close. Sometimes Penny misses it; she hasn't been close to another person in the same way since.

But maybe that's what happens, when your sister and best friend in the world turns to the Dark Side - which does not, despite popular rumor, have cookies. Penny still doesn't understand the appeal, especially since all Sandra got out of it was killed by someone else who could do the same thing, presumably because she was unnecessary competition. Even if they had still been talking at that time, Penny doubts she would know exactly why it happened.

All she knows is she decided, after that final blowout argument with Sandra, that she wasn't going to get tied up in that part of the world again. Captain Hammer... is something of an accident, on that front, and she doesn't know how far that's going to go, but still. She doesn't take sides, since she's not sure heroes can save the world any more than the villains who think it needs burning.

And she definitely doesn't know any villains.

***

She gets a clue the next day, over laundry. She and Billy get to talking again; he's fretting over a job application (for what exactly, he never says).

"Oh, I've been rejected from a few jobs," she says. It's her default setting, in a way: When in doubt, attempt to comfort. "Even fired a couple of times."

"I can't imagine anyone firing you."

"I couldn't either. Of course, now I can visualise it really well."

Billy looks like he's trying not to laugh - Penny wouldn't mind if he did, by now. She's put the worst of the pain of those rejections behind her.

"Still," he says. "I want to be able to _do_ something with my life, you know? I want to be an achiever. Like Bad Horse."

Penny hopes he can't see how much her heart is sinking on her face. "The Thoroughbred of Sin?"

He tries to cover, but 'Ghandi' sounds nothing like 'Bad Horse,' and after the encounter she had the day before... well. Penny does her best not to let it worry her for the rest of the afternoon, and the conversation doesn't feel any less awkward than it had been.

She doesn't want to take Billy's statement as a deep insight into his mind, but under the circumstances, she feels like she has to at least investigate it. She makes a mental note, and puts it out of her mind until she's home and has all of her laundry put away.

After that, she turns to the Internet; Google has a way of telling people anything they look for. Given the nature of what she's likely looking for, she digs out her old clunker of a laptop that doesn't have anything important on it anymore. (One of the shelter volunteers does tech support for a living; Penny took the hard drive to her, when she decided to stop using it for her everyday work, and had it wiped.)

She never thought she'd see the day she Googled 'Evil League of Evil,' but here it is. With what she does know, it seems like the most reasonable place to start; maybe they have a list of recent applicants, or something. In any case, she's not doing this on her new laptop. It'd probably be bogged down with viruses before she could blink. Her old one, she thinks, is either too old to catch things or past due for a full retirement anyway; either way, it doesn't matter so much.

She doesn't find an official list of recent applications, but she does turn up a blog that tracks League applicants. It's almost fascinating reading in its own right; the blogger tracks the people who don't end up getting in, even after they phase out of the application process, and comments on their idea of the chances the current pool has of getting in.

Sandra never made it as far as applying, as far as Penny knows.

Anyway, she reads over the notes about the current applicant pool, and follows links where she can. For a while, none of them really sound like Billy - but perhaps that's the point, considering he hasn't officially owned up to anything. Still, it gives her some hope that the woman was wrong about their having a mutual acquaintance.

At least, it does until she gets to Dr. Horrible.

The blogger seems to think Dr. Horrible's chances of actually getting into the League are low; he apparently goes out of his way to avoid taking lethal action, or dragging bystanders into his messes. He keeps a blog of his own, but the person running this one doesn't think much of it, saying that he spends too much time ruining his own plans and going on about some girl for it to really be useful as a PR tool.

The clincher comes when Penny follows the provided link, and sees the still frames on the top couple of video players.

She absolutely does not want to believe what she's seeing. Billy's too sweet for this. He wants to do some good for the world, he said so himself. He might think the best way to help people is to do everything all at once, but his heart's in the right place.

But the cynical part of her brain - which doesn't come out to play often, but seems to like harping on heroes and villains - notes that the same could have been said of her sister, in its way.

The cynical part of Penny's brain still sounds a hell of a lot like Sandra, even after all this time.

She doesn't know what to do next, which probably makes it a good thing that she doesn't have to right away. This is definitely going to take a while to fully process.

By the time she gets her dinner fixed up, it's a little bit out of her mind.

***

The woman comes back to the shelter on Monday, and hands Penny a scrap of paper with a URL on it. She barely has to glance at the address, given her own investigative work.

"I found it myself," she says. "I'd rather you weren't right, but it seems you are."

"Well then. Perhaps you also saw my point, that this is hardly a reasonable pursuit for him to achieve his goals?"

"Oh, I saw that before I knew who you were talking about, believe me. Just because I wasn't talking to my sister at the time doesn't mean I don't know what happened to her."

The woman raises an eyebrow. "Oh? I would be very interested to hear your take on the matter."

"Someone thought she was undue competition and killed her. Pretty cut and dry, I'd think."

The woman snorts, in a way that can only mean she's barely containing laughter; Penny glares at her.

"My apologies," the woman says, "but I think you only have the public version of the story. Hourglass thought they might do better if they worked together - they both had problems getting anyone to believe them, at that time."

"Then who did it?"

"Do you want the honest answer, or would you prefer to form your own opinions about your current relationship?"

"I don't know if you can call it a relationship after a week and a half," Penny says, but she takes the point regardless. "Don't lie to me."

"I was not planning to, unless you requested it. Captain Hammer was partly responsible for your sister's death. Not entirely, but had he not been there, I doubt the blame would have fallen on Hourglass. He has a way of... what is it, spinning the press?"

"Yeah. Spinning." Oddly, she doesn't want to believe this story any more than she wants to believe Billy's blog, even if the cynical part of her brain is quick to point out that Captain Hammer has always seemed too good to be true. Penny prefers seeing the best of people for a reason.

But clearly, she can't afford to do that, in this case. She's missed too much of the story already.

"I still don't see how you're claiming to be a neutral party in all of this."

The woman smiles a bit. "The League is not beneficial, nor is working with the heroes. I work alone, and I think our mutual acquaintance will be best served by doing the same. But so long as he thinks there is some kind of acceptance in the League, beyond the fact that I'm beginning to think Bad Horse just wants to watch him squirm, he will keep trying."

"But if you want to - do something about that, why come to me?"

"Most everyone else has taken their sides already. Besides, your sister mentioned you a few times, and she was rarely wrong, especially if something came up more than once. What is it that you do?"

Penny sighs. "Working retail and volunteering at a homeless shelter do not constitute the makings of a superpower. Neither does incurable optimism, last I checked. Are you sure you don't have the wrong person?"

"The Soothsayer only had one sister. And - perhaps she was wrong, this once, but that does not change the fact that you stand to lose a friend, if we do nothing. I would say the same of the man you're dating, but there's little to be done for someone who thinks he does not need saving. Still, I think we have a few days before the matter truly becomes urgent. Think on it."

"I will, but I don't guarantee you'll like the answer. Who are you, anyway?"

The woman pauses, on the verge of leaving the shelter, and smiles at Penny. "They call me Conflict Diamond."

She leaves, and Penny stares at the door for a few moments, before shaking it off and getting back to business. She can't say what the world's coming to, when a jewel thief is asking her for help _against_ the Evil League of Evil and both of the new guys in her life have surprisingly nasty sides to them, but either way, she suspects her life just got a lot more interesting - and that she can't just ignore this one until it goes away.

***

She's more grateful than she can say for the eight-hour work day on Tuesday. It gives her a chance to stop worrying about all this new information - not exactly not thinking about it, but more sort of letting it percolate on a background level. She sorts through important stuff better when she doesn't keep stewing over it.

She spends Wednesday morning at the shelter, and heads to the laundromat in the afternoon. She's not sure if doing her laundry will help clear her head as much as it usually does, if Billy's there, but she intends to give it all she's got. The laundromat's fairly crowded; there's only one open washer when she gets there. She puts her clothes in, starts it up, and settles in to wait.

Her washer's nearly done when Billy gets there. The place is still busy enough that she's not going to bring up the research she did over the weekend, or her conversations with Conflict Diamond - if they're going to talk about that, it's probably better they do so in private, and anyway, it might be better that he not know, just in case she does end up doing something.

Billy eyes the washers for a few moments, then sighs. "It's not usually this crowded, on Wednesdays. Wonder what got into people."

Penny shrugs. "Couldn't say. Mine should be done in a couple minutes, if you want."

"That'd be good. Thanks."

"No problem."

She empties the washer, when it stops, but comes back from the dryer bank to find Billy staring at a piece of paper taped on the top. She hadn't seen it, so it probably flipped up over the back of the control panel.

"This one's out of order," Billy says, and Penny frowns.

"It worked fine for me."

"Yeah, but... this was there when you used it."

"Maybe they fixed it and forgot to take the sign off," she says, but she knows that doesn't really hold water. This place is good about keeping its signage up to date, if not precisely visible.

"Maybe. Or maybe... huh. You should probably look into that - it could be something on your end."

"News to me, if it is."

Billy shrugs. "It usually is news to people, from what I've s-- heard. But, well... could be useful. Instant repair service, or something."

"Or something. I don't know. We'll see, I guess."

In any case, the washer works just fine for Billy. Penny considers taking the sign off, but ultimately decides against it; if the thing _is_ working because of her, it might stop again after she leaves. And if it stays fixed... well, the laundromat owners will probably assume whoever told them it was broken was mistaken. She's seen people try to get free laundry that way before.

Either way, there's not much she can do about it now.

***

When she gets home, she tries to figure out how she can self-test this. She can't think of any stand-out mechanical or electronic devices in her apartment - and maybe that should have told her something a long time ago, she doesn't know. What she does know is she has no way of finding out until the next time she's at the shelter. She doesn't get to see any of the repair jobs at work, and people would want to know why she was asking to get in on it now.

She's not even sure she wants to know what's going on, really. There are people who think that anyone who's got some sort of superpower _has_ to do something with it, and while she can follow that logic, she still doesn't want to take sides, even if something is going on. If she doesn't know, then she can't do anything about it.

But it'll be better for her, in the long run, if she does investigate, so she asks the shelter's computer person if she knows of anything, on Friday afternoon. Eliza has to think about it for a while, but then she brightens.

"I think one of the time clocks has been on the fritz for a couple weeks now," she says. "The one down by the back door. Why do you ask?"

"I... need to test something. And I couldn't think of anything at home that would work."

"Fair enough. How're things otherwise? It's been a while since we've been here at the same time."

Penny pauses for a few seconds, then sighs. "It's kind of complicated. I've got a lot going on at the moment, and it's not exactly fun to sort through."

"I know the feeling. But knowing you, you'll come through just fine."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence."

Eliza grins. "No problem."

When she hits a lull in her work, Penny goes downstairs and has a look at the recalcitrant time clock. She shouldn't know the first thing about what's wrong with it, she knows that - and yet, after about ten seconds, she thinks she knows what's gumming up the printing mechanism.

She finds a piece of scrap paper and tries it out. It works just fine; Penny wishes she could say that was a comfort, but it really isn't.

Eliza's waiting at the landing, when Penny goes back upstairs. "That help you figure anything out?"

"It might have. Let me know if it stops working again? I'm... not sure exactly what's going on yet, but this is probably a better place to set the parameters than the laundromat."

"All right. Are you - it's not some kind of problem, is it?"

Penny sighs. "If I ever figure that part out, I'll let you know."

***

It hasn't escaped her notice that when she _has_ heard from Captain Hammer in the last week, he's only talked about himself. In her admittedly limited experience, people trying to build a relationship don't let their eyes glaze over when they're not the center of attention. She gets tired of trying to make him talk about something else after a few days, but can't see how to get him to leave her alone. Apparently, that's going to take some work.

She spends Saturday morning at the shelter, and almost wishes she could be surprised when Conflict Diamond shows up. But she's not, at this point; apparently, there are more loose ends that need tying off than she thought.

"I suppose you are still a bit undecided?"

Penny sighs. "More than a bit. But you may have been right, about... the second thing. I'm still trying to figure out what exactly is going on, on that front."

"I would imagine so. It... is the sort of thing that requires a bit of adjustment."

"You - well, I suppose you would know, wouldn't you?"

Conflict Diamond shrugs. "It is hardly a requirement for such things, but it can help." She pulls an envelope out of a pocket and adds, "This is for you."

Penny eyes the envelope; all it has written on it is her name, but there's no mistaking the handwriting. "Then why didn't she give it to me herself?"

"I think because she knew you were not prepared to listen. Whether you are now, I do not know, but it seemed appropriate."

Penny sighs; it seems, as usual, there's no explaining Sandra's logic, even when she's long dead. "Well. Thank you. But my shift's up soon, so I really should be going."

"All right. Monday, I think, we should sort out what it is we are or are not doing." She leaves without another word; Penny eyes the letter for a few moments, then sighs and closes up shop on her things.

She stops at home before the laundromat, to pick up her laundry and leave the letter there; she doesn't want to read it in a public setting, even though it probably won't be as crowded as it was on Wednesday. Whatever last words Sandra felt important enough to write down will be best dealt with when Penny's on her own.

Billy's already at the laundromat, when she gets there; she gets so caught up in talking to him that she completely forgets Captain Hammer said he might stop by until he gets in the door. Billy looks like he wants to bolt, but doesn't.

Penny doesn't offer many comments on the conversation, but she does watch, and that tells her a lot. Captain Hammer seems to think he should be lauded until the cows come home, for possibly bullying the mayor into signing that old building over to the shelter; he's a little bit right, but Penny's not getting the impression he did it for the right reasons. Billy just looks like he's doing his best not to go ballistic in the middle of the laundromat, especially after Penny steps away to put her clothes in the dryer.

Captain Hammer blinks. "You're not ready to go?"

"I got here later than I told you," she says. "I've got another hour or so."

"Oh. All right then. I'll see you tonight."

She's not so sure he will, but she lets him leave without saying so. He'll just stay and pester her otherwise, she suspects, and anyway, Billy still looks perilously close to an explosion.

"You all right?"

Billy blinks a few times, then gives her an incredibly strained smile. "I'm fine."

"You sure? You really don't look it."

"I just - I don't know what the _hell_ you see in that idiot."

Penny eyes the laundromat's front door for a few moments. "I'm beginning to wonder the same thing myself."

***

When she gets home, she ignores the letter for a while longer, focusing instead on putting her clothes away and fixing some dinner. It's been a much fuller day than she expected, and she's not sure she wants to make it even fuller.

But... well. Back in the day, she went to Sandra with all of her problems, from a scraped knee to school bullies and everything in between. Granted, for a while Sandra couldn't do much more about the situations than Penny could, but at least she had a shoulder to cry on. Maybe, if her sister had so much insight into the future, there'll be some useful nugget for her current dilemma.

With that in mind, she cleans up her dinner dishes, settles into her bed, and opens the letter.

_Hey, Pen,_ it starts, and Penny smiles a little despite herself; no one else ever shortened her name like that.

_I know I'm probably the last person you want to hear from at this time in your life, whatever time that may be - I'm not so good as to know exactly when you'll get this, but given the way our last conversation went, I think it's safe to say ye olde sisterly advice isn't going to have quite the open-armed reception it once did. But don't throw this out without reading it, all the same._

_If you're reading this, it's likely because you've manifested some kind of power (again, I'm not so good as to know exactly what) and I'm not around to try to offer commentary in person. I won't ask you to make the same choice I did, re: what to do with it. You wouldn't anyway; we're not the same person, despite some parental commentary to the contrary. But do, at least, figure out what it is you've got and how to use it, whether you make a habit of doing so or not. That's safer by far than bottling it up until it explodes - which, depending on what you've got, could get very messy._

_You can trust Conflict Diamond, by the way, unless you've got a jewelry store I don't know about; she means it when she says she's a neutral party. And don't give me that face, it's bound to have crossed your mind, if you have this to read it._

_I am sorry I hurt you with my choices. I really am. You don't have to believe that, if you don't think you can, and you never have to accept it. But - perhaps, if you ever meet the likes of Captain Hammer, you'll understand why I couldn't take the other road._

_You're probably thinking there's no way out of this bind, whatever baggage it might have brought with it. And there's probably no easy way, this is true. The world's rarely that simple. But you've always been a smart girl, and if that's changed I'll probably be over here spinning in my grave. You can find a way forward._

_I do wish this wasn't broken. But I broke it and I can't fix it, so this will have to do._

_I still love you, Pen, and I always will._

_Sandra_

Penny rereads the letter a couple of times, and finds herself half wishing Sandra _had_ been good enough to know exactly what's going on right now. She could really use the more specific advice.

But the general advice does help, in its way, and she doesn't cry herself to sleep despite all the emotional stresses of the day. That's got to be a plus.

***

She's scheduled in at the store for all of Sunday. That's just as well; she really doesn't want to hear about whatever it was Captain Hammer wanted to do last night. Even if she hadn't read the letter, she doubts she would have been up for hearing all about him all night.

She checks her phone on her lunch break, and finds that he's called her five times already. She wishes that was a surprise, and braces herself for him to show up at the end of the day; he doesn't disappoint.

"What are you doing here?"

"You didn't show up last night," he says. "And you didn't answer when I called earlier."

"Because I've been working all day and my phone was in the break room. What do you want?"

"Aren't you going to come over tonight?"

Penny sighs. "Probably not. It's been a very long day, and I just need to relax."

"You can relax with me."

"Not as well as I need to." She can tell from the look on his face that he really doesn't understand how this could be possible, but she has neither the time nor the energy to talk him through it tonight; instead, she switches to professional mode.

"The store is closing in five minutes," she says. "If you're going to buy something, find it and buy it. If you're not, please go home. If I feel up to coming over after work, I will, but you shouldn't hold your breath. I've had a very long weekend, and need to sort through some things alone."

Captain Hammer just stands there for a few moments, then sighs. "Fine. I'll see you later."

Penny allows herself a sigh of relief, when he leaves. She knows that war isn't over yet, but she's won this battle, at least - and if he goes to her apartment, she'll have no problem telling him he's not welcome there today.

***

The shelter's abuzz with the good news, on Monday. Penny's glad to hear that things are moving fast, at least, even though she really dislikes how much leverage that seems to be giving Captain Hammer; no doubt he's busy congratulating himself for Helping The Little People.

Conflict Diamond shows up just before lunch starts.

"Congratulations," she says. "Though I suspect you would rather the slower approach had worked, all things considered."

Penny shrugs. "We need the space. I'm not protesting how we got it, aside from the fact that..." That Captain Hammer thinks she should be falling all over him, that Billy looked damn near homicidal at the laundromat, that it complicates things even more than they already were - but she doesn't bother finishing that thought.

"They're saying we'll be able to open next week, if we can get the new building cleaned up," she says instead. "I'll bet that something's going to happen then, if we don't make a move before that."

"So you are interested?"

"Interested in keeping a friend out of a tight spot, yes."

Conflict Diamond smiles. "This is hardly the place to talk specifics, I think. Can you get away for the lunch hour?"

"Not usually, but--" Penny checks the volunteer sign-in sheet. "There should be enough people here to cover it." She signs herself out for lunch, while she's at it, and the two of them head out.

"I have to ask," she says. "If you don't take sides in any official capacity - why do you do what you do?"

Conflict Diamond is quiet for a while; just when Penny's starting to think it was a bad question to ask after all, she sighs. "My brother was kidnapped, before my family left Liberia. He was six. If he's still alive, there's nothing left that I would recognise, but... if anyone must benefit from what those soldiers did, it will be those of us who were affected by the loss."

"I... guess I can see that." She has a hard time wrapping her head around that selfish of a motivation, but she can at least see where it arose from the circumstances. "Thought people had protections against the worst of that, though."

"I will believe that when people in Africa stop killing each other."

"Fair enough, I guess." She wants to ask why Conflict Diamond would use the term for something that's caused her so much grief as an alias, but figures it boils down to bitter irony. Anyway, there's a more important question to be asked, so she asks that. "Do you... have some kind of plan in mind?"

"There is a bylaw that may be worth pursuing. All League applicants are required to re-submit their applications, if the leader at the time they first filed dies. I believe it's meant to weed out people who were only in consideration for the amusement of others."

Penny smiles a little, remembering Billy's clumsy 'the fish rots at the head' metaphor, but sobers quickly. "That would be a pretty big undertaking."

"But not impossible. I am given to understand that he thinks no one can know his secrets." Conflict Diamond smiles, though it's such a menacing expression that it's probably pushing the limits of the term. "And he does not realise that, in working his henchmen as he has, they might grow dissatisfied enough to share those secrets, in what little time off they have."

"You... know one of them?"

"We dated, for a bit. The constraints of his work made it impossible to carry on, but not before I got some very useful information. How we use it depends on what you can contribute to the matter."

Penny hesitates for a moment, at that. She's still not quite sure what she can do - though according to Eliza, the time clock is still working just fine - or how it could be at all useful in the situation at hand. But on the other hand, doing nothing isn't really an option, at this point in time; she has a feeling that inaction will just mean _someone_ dies next week, and she'd rather not see that happen.

Captain Hammer's proving enough of a jerk that he needs to be taken down a few pegs, yes, but she still doesn't want to see him dead. It wouldn't solve anything.

So she explains what she knows of what's going on, on the grounds that every little bit might help. Conflict Diamond takes it all in, and nods when Penny finishes.

"I think I can make a plan out of that," she says. "It will take some consideration, particularly since you are not entirely sure of your capabilities. But we will see what we can do."

***

It's a long couple of days, after that discussion. Work isn't any more stressful than usual, but the shelter's running full tilt trying to get the new building cleaned up and ready for use as housing - and Captain Hammer is mysteriously absent, whenever there's work to be done. She'd have thought he would want in on the extra publicity from that - or, failing that, the chance to bother her some more.

He's still calling her quite a bit, but he doesn't show up at the store again, which is something of a relief. She doesn't want to have to report his incessant bugging of her as harassment, and the fact that he's backed down to just calling her a lot gives her some hope that she won't have to. Of course, the phone calls are a little annoying by themselves, but she can't fix everything, and she's too worn out from the shelter work and her regular job to ask him what it is he _wants_ from her.

She's looking forward to laundry day even more than usual - but Billy's not there at all, on Wednesday. It's troubling, especially after Saturday, and leaves her hoping like hell that Conflict Diamond's plan is a good one. She takes what comfort she can in getting her laundry done, but it's not quite as soothing as it usually is.

They'd better not be too late, is all she can think. She'd rather not lose another person the same way she lost her sister.

She works Thursday morning, and helps out at the shelter in the afternoon; when she's ready to leave, she notices Conflict Diamond waiting outside. She takes a deep breath, then heads out.

"Tell me you've got a good plan," she says. "I think we're going to have to move fast to prevent a total disaster."

Conflict Diamond smiles. "I think I have something. Do you have time tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow?" Concerned as Penny is, she hadn't been expecting things to move _that_ fast. "I - think so. I was going to help with the new building some, but I could always do that before."

"After, more likely. The best time to make a move will be in the early morning, both from traffic concerns and doing something unseen. There will probably only be one alarm in our way - a surprising lack of security, for someone of his stature, but he does tend to underestimate humans."

"And if I can't get the alarm to... cooperate?"

"Then I have an alternate plan for it," Conflict Diamond says. "I don't know that we could convince the person who inspired the plan to come along, even if we could afford to have three people hanging around, but a spray bottle will be convenient enough."

"Do I want to know how you got this idea from a person?"

"If you ever meet him, you will understand. He is a nice enough person, but he tends to underestimate himself."

"Okay then." Penny's feeling more than a little out of her depth in this conversation, but she tries to make the best of it for now. "So what happens once we get in there?"

"It is only a stable. Compromising the food supply will be easy enough. I will not ask you to do that part, since it will be the fatal blow, in all likelihood."

"Are you sure that's going to do the job as quickly as we need it to?"

Conflict Diamond shrugs. "Horses cannot vomit, so it will be far more effective than it would on a human. And knowing our mutual acquaintance, he will hold out for some sort of display with an audience, if he can. By your estimate, we will at least have the weekend."

"All right. And what do we do if we get caught?"

"If it comes to blows, I will take them. I am better prepared for a fight in more ways than one. But even if it does not, you will need these, as a precaution."

Penny eyes what she's handed for a few moments, trying to figure out the significance. "Noise-canceling headphones?"

"He _has_ driven people mad with a sound, before - even killed a few. You will want them, in case we're found out. The goal here is not for us to die."

"This is true." Penny helps herself to another deep breath. "Well... I guess I'll see you tomorrow, then."

"I will meet you at the new shelter. It is more convenient to where we have to go than most places."

"All right then."

Penny tries to keep her head, when she gets home, and fixing dinner helps a little with that. Still, she wasn't expecting things to move this quickly; it's a little alarming to think that tomorrow's going to be so risky.

But it'll be worth it in the end, if this actually works out. She suspects she's going to have to corner Billy and spell out exactly why what he's doing is a terrible idea, but after tomorrow morning, that should be the easy part.

***

She sleeps soundly enough that getting up early is, fortunately, not much of a problem. After she gets some tea in the microwave, she digs out a pair of jeans and an old shirt - clothes she won't mind getting dirty, and that she doesn't usually wear in public - gets dressed, and finds a hair tie. Once she's had her tea and some breakfast, she's... well, she's still more than a little nervous about the whole affair, but she's at least awake enough to deal with it.

Then there's a knock on her door, which gives her pause. She knows who it isn't, and one thing she very much appreciates out of all of this is that Conflict Diamond has been meeting her on relatively neutral territory, but that doesn't really do much to narrow down the possibilities.

She checks through the peephole, sighs, and opens the door. "What are you doing here?"

Captain Hammer blinks. "You've been avoiding me all week. I wanted to know why."

It's too early for this, never mind her plans for the rest of the morning. "I do have a life outside of you, you know."

"How?"

She can't help bristling at that, even though he sounds less possessive and more genuinely confused by the notion that someone's life might not revolve around him. "I had a life before I met you, and it didn't stop just because you took me out to dinner a few times. In fact, thanks to you, it's been a hell of a lot busier lately - if you really wanted to see me that badly, you could have come by the new building and _helped_. Or, you know, left a message one of the dozens of times you've called me in the last week."

"But I figured you would--"

"I would call you back? When I've been busy? You can't do this half-assed reaching out thing and expect it to get results just because you're a hero." She sighs, and adds, mostly to herself, "I can almost see what my sister meant, now."

"Who's your sister?"

"Go away. Just... go. It's too early for this, I don't have the time or the energy to hear whatever explanation you've got now, I - maybe tonight. Maybe."

Captain Hammer smiles; it doesn't come across as pleasantly as he probably means it to. "I'll pick you up for dinner."

"I said maybe. I'll call you if I want to see you. Now go away." She'd threaten to call the police, but she's not sure they'd believe Captain Hammer was capable of harassing someone.

Fortunately, he leaves on his own. Penny sighs, takes a few minutes to recover her equilibrium, and leaves about ten minutes later, once she's sure Captain Hammer won't be lying in wait.

Conflict Diamond is waiting outside the new shelter, when Penny gets there. She doesn't say anything, just nods and leads Penny to what looks like a work van.

"You did remember the headphones, one hopes?"

Penny nods. "They're in my bag."

"Leave the bag here, when we get there. It will likely slow us down more than we can afford."

The rest of the drive, to a stable and pasture connected to a race track, passes in silence. The traffic's actually not too bad; Penny has to figure there's not much interest in going to a race track unless there's a race on. When they get there, Penny takes the headphones out of her bag and rests them around her neck before they get out.

"He should not be in at the moment," Conflict Diamond says, "so the alarm will be armed."

"Can't say I've ever seen a stable with an alarm before."

"You have likely also not seen a stable that houses the head of the League."

"True."

When they reach the stable in question, Penny eyes the alarm pad for what feels like ages. She's not a security expert in the first place, and she's never seen anything like this - but it makes a certain amount of sense. Bad Horse would want to be able to let himself in and out without calling in help. She's not sure what to do with it, at first, but then she sees some buttons on the bottom.

"I think that might be a way to disable it," she says, and has a closer look. Even without the weird gut feeling about what to do, she thinks she might be able to figure this one out; one of the buttons looks like it's never been touched. At a guess, she'd say it completely resets the alarm.

She tries it, and her guess proves right. "We're in."

"Excellent." Conflict Diamond strides in without a second thought; Penny follows, on the grounds that it might be safer to be inside than out. It's the biggest stable meant for one horse she's ever seen - and it _has_ to be meant for one horse, if only because she doesn't see this one sharing well with others.

She tries to keep an eye on the door, just in case, but keeps finding herself distracted by her surroundings. It's a bit like a train wreck; she really doesn't want to know the details, but she'll probably never be in a position like this again.

Conflict Diamond sets to business with the food trough in short order. Penny doesn't know exactly what she has in mind, and decides not to ask, instead half trying to watch the door and half taking in the rest of the stable.

Which turns out to be a good thing, when she sees the second alarm system, down low to the floor. "Um. I think we're going to have company."

Conflict Diamond curses - Penny doesn't recognise the language, but there's only one category of words that requires that vehement of delivery. "Headphones. _Now._ He'll likely be here soon."

Penny fumbles a bit, but gets the headphones over her ears just in time. They throw off her sense of balance, but what little she does hear when Bad Horse gets there leaves her glad Conflict Diamond thought to bring the things.

After that, she just does her best to avoid being trampled. It's a lot harder than she would have thought, but she does all right - until she finds herself backed into a corner.

She's too terrified to move, so it's a good thing Conflict Diamond isn't; she pushes Penny out of the way and takes the brunt of Bad Horse's charge herself. Penny lands on her side - the headphones still have her off-balance enough that she can't stay upright coming out of that shove - and keeps her eyes screwed shut for a minute or so. She doesn't know how that could possibly have ended any better than being charged herself would have.

But she can't stay here forever, so she finally does risk a look. Bad Horse looks distinctly injured - certainly in no shape to charge anyone else - and Conflict Diamond is rubbing her forearms. She says something, but Penny can't tell what; it does seem safe enough to take the headphones off for now, so she does that and says, "What was that?"

"That may actually leave bruises." Conflict Diamond sounds far more amused than anything else.

"...What?"

"My alias is only partly bitter irony. It takes quite a bit to leave a mark on me." She smiles. "I think we can call our job safely done--" She pauses, tensing up again. "Someone else is here."

Penny hears the footsteps after that, and frowns. "Who could it be?"

"One of the cowboys, I would guess, but they usually come here as a group. Unless someone followed us here, which I doubt..."

They stay where they are, on guard, until the owner of the footsteps gets to the stable's doorway. When he does, Penny sighs. "Would you _stop_ following me around?"

"I thought you were in trouble," Captain Hammer says. "And being _here_ encourages that thought. Did they take you hostage?"

"God, why do you assume you have to save everyone from everything? And if that's what you came out here for, why didn't you make an appearance before now?"

"It is his style," Conflict Diamond says. "I have it on good authority that when he did save you, he did as little work as he could for as much credit as he could milk out of the situation."

"Dr. Horrible nearly killed her!" Captain Hammer walks over to Penny, grabs her hand, and pulls her upright. "Come on, let's go back to my place."

Penny hesitates for a moment. There are a lot of things she doesn't like about this situation, and there's a lot of information in those last two comments that she needs to unpackage and process - later, since this isn't really the time or the place. But what she likes the least is that Captain Hammer seems to think he should sweep in and rescue her when she not only doesn't need rescuing, but she sort of rescued herself - and when someone else _did_ step in, it was someone he'd dismiss as a villain without a second thought.

So instead of responding out loud, she knees him in the groin. It hurts like hell, but she does get the pleasure of seeing his eyes cross.

"Not my surprisingly delicate manly parts!" he squeaks - seriously squeaks, at least two octaves up from usual - and Penny couldn't choke back a laugh at that if she tried. Still, she's annoyed enough with him that she sobers up fairly quickly.

"Leave me the _hell_ alone," she says. "I'm done giving you second chances." With that, she walks out of the stable, doing her best not to limp.

She's going to need an ice pack later, but that was totally worth it.

***

She spends Friday afternoon and Saturday morning sorting through paperwork for the shelter; she can't just abandon them for the weekend, but her knee is sore enough that she'd rather avoid most of the active work, just to be on the safe side. She doesn't _think_ she really hurt herself, and is again running into the problem of whether anyone would believe her if she told them what happened; probably if she puts as little stress on it as possible, she'll be all right.

Fortunately, that seems to have been enough of a hint for Captain Hammer to leave her _alone_. What's keeping him so popular in the public eye, she's not sure, but she's beginning to suspect it has a lot to do with people not talking to him on a daily basis.

She considers skipping the laundromat, on Saturday afternoon, but decides against it. If she doesn't stay on top of the piles now, they'll only get bigger - and anyway, if Billy's there, she needs to talk to him. So she goes, and stops by the frozen yogurt stand on her way in, as much to have something to share just in case as so she has something cold to hold against her knee.

Billy comes in about ten minutes after she gets a washer started. He doesn't look homicidal anymore, but he doesn't look notably pleased with the world either. Penny takes some comfort in the fact that he smiles and says hi when he sees her.

"Hey. Want a frozen yogurt? I got two."

He blinks, then grins again. "Sure. Thanks. Um... what happened to your leg?"

"Captain Hammer's family jewels. On the bright side, I think it got him to take the hint - if he's not going to bother explaining himself, I don't want him hanging around."

"Good for you."

Penny shrugs. "I try to see the best in people, but... I guess he finally made that impossible. What about you? I missed you on Wednesday."

"I was busy. And apparently, through _no_ fault of my own, I'm three steps back _any_way, so... I'm trying to figure out what to do next."

"Why, what happened?"

Billy hesitates, and glances to his left. "Well. Um."

"Don't lie to me, Billy. What happened?"

After a long few moments, Billy sighs. "Someone... went after Bad Horse. So he's dead, and if I still want in the League, I have to start over."

"Why is that what you want?"

"They have some kickass labs at their disposal. And... well, you were dating the alternative for a while there."

Penny smiles, a bit more sadly than she intended to - but it sounds like her sister's letter, a little bit. "Not the only alternative."

"Do... you know more about this than you're letting on?"

"I might. What I definitely know is you're a better person than someone who has to go through the bad guys. My sister was too."

Billy blinks. "I didn't know you had a sister."

"Well, 'had' is the operative word. She found out the hard way that the Dark Side doesn't have any cookies. I haven't really squared with it, but... that's not the way to go. And after the last few weeks, I'm not about to say Captain Hammer's got the right idea, but."

"I just - the world is a _mess_. It needs changing. And I don't see anyone else stepping up to the plate to do it."

Penny raises an eyebrow. "Including the League. Unless you think the world burning down is really going to solve anything."

"Well... not really, no." Billy sighs. "Then I guess I made myself a death ray for nothing."

"Probably just as well. No one learns anything from being killed."

"How'd you find out about all this, anyway?"

"Friend of my sister's turned up," Penny says. "And... a little independent research, the first time you mentioned Bad Horse. I'm not saying you have to lay off the mad science or the blog or anything, it looks like it's too much a part of you by now, but there's a better way to get where you want to go."

"Not exactly easier."

"Well, no, but it's worth it. Even if you don't do as much as you want to, in the long run, you can make a difference."

Billy sighs again. "I don't know. I guess - I have to think about it for a while. I couldn't re-apply until next year anyway, I don't think, so it's not like I have to know tonight or anything."

"And I'm not expecting you to make up your mind right this second. Just... keep in mind that I've seen where this can end up, and I think you're better than that."

There's another fairly long pause, but then, Billy smiles - a genuine smile, not the uncomfortable one from last week. "That... really does help. Thanks."

"No problem."

They move on to lighter conversation topics, after that; by the time Penny's laundry is done, she's feeling better, both physically and emotionally. She doubts the conversation had anything to do with her knee feeling a little better, other than the fact that she wasn't putting weight on it for the better part of two hours.

But Captain Hammer's leaving her alone, and Billy's at least re-thinking his plans, even if he's not likely to have any answers for a while. She can call that a victory, and totally worth everything else that's happened the last few weeks.


End file.
